Location: Vienna, Virginia, United States

A graduate of Dartmouth College (2005) and Washington and Lee University School of Law (2010). These are my personal blogs, and the musings expressed on them do not reflect the positions of my employer. They do reflect my readings, thoughts, and aspirations, which I figure is good enough.

Friday, April 22, 2005


I realized something today as I was sitting in my Women and Journalism class.

My biggest problem this term, in the classroom and outside of it, has been second-guessing myself.

I've been doing it enough that it's starting to really affect everything I do, from participating to interviewing for jobs to everyday life.

For instance, participating in class today just didn't happen for me, even though I had plenty to say about the topic of ethics and interviewing. I just couldn't get my hand up. (And being the only guy in the class isn't a problem).

Wait, that sounds really bad . . . I think I just made a case that I have Decision-Making Erectile Dysfunction or something like that.

Fine. I'll coin the term and go with it.

Hi everyone. My name is William Li. I suffer from Decision-Making Erectile Dysfunction.

After all, the first step is admitting you have a problem.

I can come up with several reasons for why this might be happening, but right now I'm more concerned with dealing with it and being more decisive.

One of the reasons I got my interview with Milberg Weiss a few weeks ago was because I was decisive during the first interview. I answered questions quickly, I followed a logical progression in my answers, and I was even able to inject a little humor here and there to convey some sense of personality.

And I'm positive that I was able to do this because I had a normal conversation beforehand. After I went to lunch with Kelly from the A&BC (where I worked last summer), it was a lot easier to talk to the interviewers because I'd gotten some practice in interacting with real people and was capable of making normal conversation, which is all an interview really is.

One of the reasons I messed up my second Milberg Weiss interview was because I barely talked to anyone that day. It kind of changes the nature of your interview when the first person you talk to face-to-face is your interviewer.

Instead of walking in and being able to speak freely, it was as if I walked in, had to reflect on the fact that I was about to have a conversation, and by the time this notion had settled in and I was ready to give a good account of myself, the interview was over.

This is something I think I'll have to incorporate into any future interview - I'll talk to someone beforehand, at breakfast, at lunch, driving to the train station. First of all, it'll get my mind off the interview. And second of all, I'll be more prepared for actual human interaction when the interview starts.

You know, it strikes me that ED drugs are a horrible thing. Not just because they make all those commercial about Levitra and Viagra and whatnot. Not just because they stream billions of dollars into an industry that should be focusing on other, less profitable but more beneficial drugs.

But there really bad because we don't need sixty year old men reawakening their libidos. We don't need any more sex in our already sex-obsessed lives. Honestly, considering the explosion of sexual idolatry with Hollywood and music, the last thing we need is a drug that promotes more sex.

Imagine what the world would be like if there was a drug for Decision-Making Erectile Dysfuntion. On one hand, people that really suffer from indecision (I mean really suffer, to the point that pulling your pants on in the morning is a problem - right leg? left leg?) could take it and get through their daily life better. Things would be more streamlined, interviews might go smoother, everyday life could be made a whole lot less strenuous for some people. In comparison, some people that take ED drugs probably need them. But then there are the remainder of people without ED who don't need ED drugs, and the remainder of the people without D-MED who wouldn't need D-MED drugs.

For example, due to certain circumstances, I'm having trouble making decisions and being decisive. Do I need a drug? Or am I better off thinking about the problem and resolving to deal with it myself? If I had the drug, I'd take it, get dependent on it, and before long, it would be like the drug was making decisions for me.

I wonder if that's a problem with recreational Viagra users. If they get dependant on it, are they still the ones getting it up?

But second-guessing and reflection really is a necessary component of everyday life too, isn't it? I shudder to imagine what a Presidential election would look like if the majority of voters just went to the poll and made a spur of the moment decision without reflecting on the pertinent issues and the candidate's stances.

Oh wait. That's right. We're living that reality right now.

Maybe what most Americans need isn't something that makes them more decisive, but more indecisive.

No, I won't accrue thousands of dollars of credit card debt trying to keep up with my neighbors (who are also in thousands of dollars of credit card debt).

No, I won't splurge on an SUV and will consider less convenient and less trendy but more energy efficient methods of transportation.

No, we won't just have TV dinners again, I actually feel like cooking.

No, I won't greenlight a sequel to Final Destination 3 just because the first three somehow made money.

No, I won't try to bring down the judicial system because they refused to listen to me.

Tom DeLay, it's time you took an indecision drug. Your overinflated, self-worshipping phallus has been flapping in the wind for way too long. If you took an indecision drug, you might pause in your attempt to subvery the judicial system. You might *gasp* involve yourself in some non-partisan decision making. Something might actually get done.

I don't need a D-MED drug because part of the experience is coping with it, dealing with it, and motivating myself out of it. I do it by reading baseball columns. I do it by (I think) performing at least adequately on my ecology test yesterday even though all I did for this last week was watch baseball. I do it by writing a tongue-in-cheek blog about erectile dysfunction.

Maybe all those doctors whose knee-jerk reaction is a Zoloft perscription would be better off perscribing a diary or a blog instead.


Blogger panda said...

restores 50 MP!

seriously, though, most of us are taking one pill or another at any given point to supplement SOMETHING or another, whether it be something as minor as vitamins or something as earthshaking as viagra. and there are so called straight-edge people, who avoid taking pills of any sort just for this reason. it's why many people decide that taking any recreational drug isn't for them.

so while the ED drug argument is a good point, there's the rest of the spectrum as well- why take many other drugs if they just cultivate a dependence and a restriction on one's own individuality?

drugs, to a large extent, just erase the deficiencies that crop up in our day to day lives- but those deficiencies are what make us human.

also, i don't honestly believe that talking to people before an interview is really going to help. just relax. worst comes to worst, and the rest of your interview shits fail, you do sort of have a job opportunity- i'd need to look into it, but last i heard, which was around a week or two ago, that thirdhand offer was still open.

if you really think that, when push comes to shove, you need the job, just let me know before i go to England and i'll find out specifics...

obviously, it would entertain me greatly if i got you a job.


8:56 PM  
Blogger Satchmo said...

Well, if you're serious about a job connection, I'd need to know ASAP.

and you do have a point, that all drugs breed some kind of dependance. but some obviously do so more than others. there's a big difference between popping an aspirin to treat the intermittent headache and popping a cialis to give oneself the ability to sport wood for 36 hours.

If erections last more than four hours, have some fun.

10:42 PM  

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